Top 5 Ways for an ADD Adult to Have a Happy Holiday
By ADD Management Coach Jennifer Koretsky
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Holidays have the potential to send an adult with Attention Deficit Disorder
(ADD) into overload. Too many details to plan, kids to manage, and family to
cope with can turn a good day into a stressful one. The following suggestion can
help adults manage ADD during the holidays.
1. Know Your Own ADD and Plan Ahead to Deal with It
You know yourself better than anyone, so ask yourself "How does my ADD affect me
on the holidays?" Make a list of all the things that tend to stress you out on
the holidays, and make a plan to deal with them.
Do you tend to say impulsive things that you later regret? Plan to take a deep
breath before answering questions, so that you can think about your words before
you speak them.
Do hyper kids overwhelm? Plan to excuse yourself and take a brief walk when the
kids are so noisy that you can't think straight.
Does a family member really make you mad when s/he starts nagging or becomes
critical? Plan a simple response that won't fuel the fire, like "I'm sorry you
feel that way. I'd rather talk about a great book I'm reading right now."
Do you get antsy after a long day? Plan to end the day early, so that you don't
reach the point of irritability.
2. Don't Expect Perfection
Accept that the day won't be perfect. Nothing is! Whether you are hosting the
holiday, going to a friend or family member's, or visiting a restaurant, realize
that something is bound to go wrong. That's life. Don't hold it against
yourself, or the people around you. Whatever it is, do your best to move on and
let it go.
3. Ask For Help/Accept Help
If you're hosting the holiday, ask for help in the kitchen. This is perfectly
acceptable, and most people are happy to help out where they can. If you're
offered help, accept it with gratitude! You don't have to do it all on your own.
If you're a guest, offer to take over a task that you're good at or don't mind
doing. That doesn't necessarily mean offering to cook or serve, it can mean
keeping the kids occupied! (Or, in my family, keeping the dogs out of the
kitchen!)
4. Remember That People Do The Best They Can
Long days with family members can often end in frustration and hurt feelings.
Try to remember that people do the best they can with the skills and tools they
have. Hurtful comments probably aren't meant to be hurtful. If someone says
something to you that you find hurtful or offensive, ask yourself "What is this
person's intention?" The answer will most likely be "to be helpful." Don't hold
it against friends and family members who may not have the necessary skills to
express themselves effectively.
5. Smile!
Set the tone for those around you by being positive, smiling often, and enjoying
yourself!
© Copyright 2004
About the Author
Jennifer Koretsky is a Professional ADD Management Coach who helps adults manage
their ADD and move forward in life. She offers a
90-day intensive skill-building program, workshops, and private
coaching. Her work has been featured in numerous media, including The New York
Times Magazine and The Times (UK). To subscribe to Jennifer’s free email
newsletter, The ADD Management Guide, please visit
http://www.addmanagement.com/e-newsletter.htm
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